Dear Barbie: Facebook and Birds
Dear Barbie,
I am addicted to Facebook. I can’t get off it! It’s taking over my life!
FB4LF
Dear FB4LF
Yes there are a few of you addicts out there, it’s a shame because many of you are probably quite hot, but we would never know because you’re always hiding behind your laptop. Maybe you should go to rehab; it’s very nice and peaceful this time of year.
Xx Barbie
Dear Barbie.
I hate birds. There is one that chirps outside my window every morning at 4am, I think it’s a tui. Can I kill it? I haven’t had a proper sleep in two months.
Driven insane.
Dear driven insane,
I had this exact same problem last year, I have no idea how the infuriating little bird managed to get up to my high-rise penthouse suite to annoy me, but it did without fail every morning. I put up with it for a week, and then devised a plan. Apparently it’s bad luck or illegal or something to kill them, but cats seem to do it all the time, so I went down to the SPCA and fostered some cats and set them up on the little balcony by my room, which is where the tui frequented. It worked. The best part was I could return the cats and tell the SPCA they killed the tui. Conscience cleared on both parts. If you can’t get a cat, then dress up as one and do the deed yourself.
xx Barbie